We were never in this together.

Today was a bizarre day. I had a friend tell me that I say depressing things too much and that it makes her sad. A few hours later she proceeds to complain to me for 20 minutes about an issue in her life. I listen and console her. Give her advice. I don't judge her.

Why is it that people can't show each other common courtesy?

I think it's such a bizarre thing. I'm not sure how it happened but it seems like people are so desensitized towards each other. Empathy is almost nil and people look out for themselves and themselves only.

Not to say that you shouldn't take care of yourself. At the end of the day it's you and you alone. However I wish people showed more emotion towards each other and were less judgmental. Not to say that I'm a saint but at least I'm trying to make myself better. I swear there are some people who never give their corrosive personalities a second thought.

Today was rainy and cold. It was lonely. I'm tired of being lonely and i'm really tired of complaining about being lonely. I realize I'm not the most fit guy ever but I really do thing my personality makes up for it. Does anyone care about what people are like anymore or is it based on animalistic "MUST FUCK" instincts? I really have no idea what women want anymore, because they continually end up in fucking abusive relationships that they don't do anything about.

I guess I'm frustrated. I guess maybe I do complain a lot. I'm trying to get better. That's worth something, right?

Let it snow...

Snow day #2 of this semester and I have a Shakespeare paper to do.

Oh, it's noon. I've decided which passage I'm going to work with for a 5-6 page paper...but have yet to really start. Procrastination for the LOSE.

Life has been hectic lately (what's new?) and I'm feel really run down. Nervous about the future (what's new?) and trying to figure out if/when/where I want to go to Grad school failing the job in CA.

I'm also finally ready to admit I am desperately tired of being alone romantically. It's so frustrating trying to meet anyone, I have no idea how people date anymore. You seemingly can't trust what 90% of people say and most of the time they will send you mixed signals in regards to what they actually want vs. how they act. Sigh.

Things to look forward to:

Laptop coming this week? yay!
Watchmen on Thursday @ Midnight
Pentagram/The Devil's Blood on Friday in NYC
New England Metal and Hardcore Fest
End of the Semester
MDF
Internship in NYC

Overall, I have a lot to look forward to, but little of it gets me truly excited. I miss those days when something like MDF would have me salivating for months at a time. Although I did see pictures from that Scion festival from this past weekend which made me really anxious for MDF. What's better than 3 days of great metal, beer, and hanging with your friends? In my mind, not much.